The most precious and important things in life are, by definition, nontransactional. And to try to bargain for them is to immediately destroy them. You cannot conspire for happiness; it is impossible. But this is often what people try to do, especially when they seek out self-help and other personal development advice - they are essentially saying, "Show me the rules of the game I have to play, and I'll play it," not realising that it's the very fact that they think there are rules to happiness that is preventing them from being happy.
– Mark Manson, Everything is Fucked
The end of a melody is not its goal: but nonetheless, had the melody not reached its end it would not have reached its goal either.
– Nietzsche
Being lost in the past versus introspecting the past with your foot firmly in the present.
Our memories, our regrets, our stumbles, those stupid things we said that we wish we could shove back into our mouths - they keep replaying in our heads. Randomly. Suddenly. Pop out of nowhere and leave you feeling like shit. There's absolutely zero learning or zero growing from that experience. Just a pile of shit.
But something magical seems to happen when we don't get lost in them. Instead, when we stay firmly grounded in the present, perspective changes. Learnings happen. And it feels good. There's something positive from that negative experience. There's something beautiful that emerges from that failure.
Maybe, eventually, we can finally get rid of that bad film that keeps replaying, and replace it with something prettier.